Monday, February 25, 2008

Ralph Nader Is the Biggest Douche in the Universe 

Unable to keep his own ego in check and realize that he bears a large part of the blame for the last eight years, megalomaniac weenie Ralph Nader felt compelled to play the attention whore and announce that he is, in fact, running for president.

I really can't add much to the town hall meeting comments of Barack Obama in the wake of Nader's announcement:
"He thought that there was no difference between Al Gore and George Bush, and, eight years later, I think people realize that Ralph did not know what he was talking about..."
Well, I can add that Hillary Clinton said his "regrettable" candidacy "is responsible for George W. Bush".

I'm hoping that everyone who voted Green in 2000 -- especially in Florida -- has since learned their lesson and feels sufficiently contrite for their major contribution to putting Bush in the White House. It was you folk and the Supremes, and no one else.

And Nader should know that... probably does know that, and he doesn't give a rat's ass because, from the very beginning, he has been nothing but a grandstander. He's the anti-distaff version of Gloria Allred, an attorney who never met a case they couldn't turn into a good bout of media-whoring in order to become more famous than the competition. You think Nader ever really cared about any of the victims of Corvair crashes? Yeah -- he cared as long as their post-mortem lawsuits got his name above the fold in the Times.

Now, he doesn't care what happens to this country as long as his name is in the news, as long as they're all talking about... him. As long as ink is spilled and electrons wasted in reproducing the name "Nader", as long as the press will fellate this antiquated jackass, the more he'll feed on it, and make stupid political decisions until they haul him out in a box.

Yo, Ralph. You love this country? Get the fuck out of the race for President. You love yourself more than the future of this country? Then just get the fuck out, you Lebanese-American bastard.

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