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Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Is This Useless Fuckbag Even Relevant Anymore 

Just watching a bit of the Bush/Maliki press conference tonight, and President Dipshit has finally reached the point where he cannot open his mouth without spewing lies, which contradict past lies, ad infinitum.

For example: "I think any time you murder someone, you're a criminal" -- notwithstanding W's absolute refusal to review death sentence cases when he was Governor of Texas, going so far as to laugh over a clemency plea for a convicted woman.

Not to mention the utter bullshit that pulling out of Iraq will "embolden" the "terrorists". Yeah, horseshit.

And not to mention that every time he says we can't leave until the Mission is Complete, I flash back to that "Mission Accomplished" banner.

It's real simple, stupid. Iraq has long since passed the Saigon point. Have the troops home by Christmas. There's no point for them to be there anymore, except as targets of IEDs planted by opposite sides in what is clearly a civil war. There's not even a domino theory to quote as justification for staying, but certainly a reverse domino theory to quote as justification for getting out now -- as in, the more Iraqis who die while we're on their soil, the more Muslims in the area in general will become militant anti-American terrorists.

The argument that, "If we leave there now, they'll follow us here" is absolute, total bullshit. And, honestly, the best thing that W can do for the world and for America right now is absolutely to "Cut and Run" in Iraq.

Why? It will give Muslims in the middle east the perception that they've defeated the US (q.v. Iran 1978-1980), and they'll shut up and leave us alone for a while. At least, the few Muslim warhawks will. The rest of the regular, peace-loving, couldn't give a flying fuck about it Muslims will just breath a sigh of relief and go back to their business.

"I have a problem with a government that's isolating its people, denying its people benefits" -- another W. quote. Hm... you mean the US Government, which wants to require that Americans be pre-approved to travel out of the country as of January 2007? ("Your paperz, pleeeze!") The US Government, whose Republican branch has denied all Americans health care and wants to remove things like Medicare and Social Security?

The hypocrisy and bullshit is strong with this one. Er, sorry. This asshole in a suit. In an ideal world, there would be no American soldiers in Iraq after December 24th, and Bush, Cheney, et al would be impeached, out of office and awaiting trial for war crimes before the new Congress is sworn in in January.

Where, oh where, is the beloved comic to make a movie called "The Not-So-Great Dictator" right about now?

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Wednesday, November 08, 2006

In Happy Local News 

California mostly avoided the bad propositions -- while sucking shit on a few of them. Every proposition from 85 through 89 went down to failure. Prop 90 also lost out, which I think was a big mistake. But... Parental Notification for Abortion, Cigarette Tax, Oil Tax, Educational Property Tax, and (flawed) Campaign Reform all bit the big one.

85, Parental Notification for Abortion, was just a sucky, stupid, intrusive law, and should have gone down in flames, which it did.

86, Cigarette Tax -- what can I say but "Fuck You" to the people who voted for this one. Besides which, had it passed by anything less than a 2/3rds Margin, Big Tobacco would have been sucking money out of the state in a major lawsuit on Wednesday. You know... Prop 13. and certain pesky requirements on raising taxes. But, it's really kind of simple. You don't like a behavior? Get fucked if you think you can regulate it through taxes. Honestly, had this one passed, there would have been a major increase in cigarette theft from mini-marts, 7-Elevens, etc. There would have been a major increase in cigarette smuggling and/or "illegal" importation. The sponsors of this bill just got greedy and, as noted in campaign ads, only 10% of the money would have actually gone to anti-smoking campaigns. So, a 26 cent increase might have passed. But, $2.60 a pack? Suck my fucking left nut.

87, Gas Tax -- good idea, problematic. In theory, I'd have loved nothing more than sticking the oil company bastards with a major tax hit, seeing as how Exxon/Mobil posted the highest corporate profit per quarter ever. But there's the rub -- while the law claimed that said taxes could not be passed on to consumers, it was also applying those taxes to the entities with the most expensive lawyers. Meaning that, um, yeah -- this tax would have been passed right on to the consumer, one way or another.

88, Property Tax Increase for Education: the biggest "Fuck You" of the Election, and rightfully so -- especially given Prop 1-D, the School Facility Bond Act. Personally, I consider Property Taxes of any kind to be theft of the highest order; living proof that, in America, ownership of private property is just an illusion. Hey, if you own it, why should you have to keep paying for it? For example, you buy a $1,200 computer, and pay roughly a hundred bucks in sales tax. That should be it, right? Well, in the real world, yes. But, if computers were taxed the same way property was, you'd have to pay that hundred bucks (constantly increasing) to the state every year, or else they'd come and take your computer away. It makes no damn sense at all. But, more proof that Californians really don't get it -- they reject an up-front tax increase by dumping 88, but approve a hidden tax increase by passing 1-D. Idiots...

89, Public Funding of Campaigns -- actually, probably a good idea, but badly written. The ideal law would prohibit any campaign contributions, and force all candidates to accept public funds -- with said pool of funds being divided equally among all the parties that qualify. In other words, if there are six parties running for office and $6 million in public funds available, each candidate would receive the same amount, one million. This law wasn't that. It was just another "Maintain the status quo but trick the people into paying for it" attempt. Good call, California.

90, Eminent Domain -- sadly, voters bought the "OH MY GOD, LAWSUITS!" bullshit on this one. Hey kids, guess what? Developers want to buy up your land at discount prices and put up cheap-ass Condos and Mini-Malls. This prop was the "fuck the developers" law that was desperately needed. Lawsuits? Not so much. And, in this case, Californians bought the BS and screwed the pooch on passing a very necessary law.

As for the other screw-ups...

1-B through 1-D, you blew it big time. You passed all of these measures, adding bond-debt that has no guarantee of ever going toward what it's allegedly being raised for, and increasing property taxes as well. Anyone who voted against 88 but for any of these measures has their head firmly up their ass.

Prop 1-A, which passed, probably a good idea -- gas taxes only go to repairing roads, no-brainer.

Which brings me to Prop 83, the biggest mistake of the election. Titled "Sex Offender Reform", it was one of those unfortunate knee-jerk measures -- the sort of thing that, were you against it, would equate you with a puppy-killer. Sadly, this bill was based on overblown hype -- the image of the drooling kiddie molester drooling on every street corner.

Trouble is, that's just not true. Over the last several decades, this country has become so fucked up on the concept of "sex offender" that this bill will just create a new underclass; people we don't want in our neighborhoods. So, riddle me this: where are we going to put them?

"Sex Offender" has become far too broad a definition. In all honesty, it should be limited to this: rape someone? Mess with a kid? Then yeah, you're a sex offender and should be segregated.

Trouble is, "Sex Offender" also covers things like, "Got drunk, pissed in an alley and someone saw your unit?" "Mowed the lawn in your backyard naked and a neighbor didn't like it?" "Had consensual sex with some drunken broad who changed her story when she sobered up?" Etc., etc.

The people in that above paragraph are not sex offenders. The trouble with this stupid law is that it accepts the legal definition without making distinctions. Rapists, kiddie-molesters, child-pornographers? Sure. Keep them away from our kids forever; stick them on some farm a hundred miles from any other people. But... drunken frat boys, guys with vindictive girlfriends, people whose only broach was to have dropped their pants in front of the wrong witnesses? NOT FUCKING SEX OFFENDERS.

Until we can make the proper distinctions, Prop 83 is just a load of horse-shit witch hunt. And seventy percent of you morons fell for it. For shame.

Still, for the most part, California did much better on the Proposition thing this time around. They suffered major amnesia in re-electing ArNOld -- or have you forgotten how down in the dumps he was last December, and how little he's done in the mean time? But, on the bright side, he's such a political opportunist that he has no real party, and no politics. At least, in this case, we've elected a politician who only goes which way the wind blows.

This wind blew damn hard to the left. So, at the very least, the Governator may just blow his Austrian ass that way as well...

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You Lost, Get Over It... 

With only two Senate races still undecided at the moment -- but leaning Democratic -- it looks like Democrats may have succeeded in seizing power in both Houses of Congress. At the very least, their control of the House of Representatives is a fait accompli. The Senate is currently at 49/49.

And this is where the real work begins for the People of America. When this new Congress takes power, we have got to remind them, every minute of every day, why we put them there and what they must do. It is time to end the madness in Iraq, and it is time to remove the bad apples in the Executive Branch who have brought this country to its lowest point since... well, since the Civil War.

Several years ago, I wrote to my Congressman, demanding that he begin impeachment proceedings against Bush and Cheney. His response was that, basically, since the Democrats didn't have the majority in Congress, it would do no good.

Tomorrow, I'm going to remind him of that reply, and remind him that his only excuse has now been removed. Tomorrow, I'm going to remind him and my Senators that Nancy Pelosi may speak for the House, but she does not speak for the People of this country.

And, another thing to remind them of: the President seems to have lost sight of one very important detail. There is a supreme leader in this land, but it's no him, it's not any elected official. No; the supreme leader of America is -- thanks to the founders and the Constitution -- the People of America.

Tonight, we have spoken. The Republicans gained not a single seat in the House, the Senate nor any Governorship. They've lost the majority in the House. They've lost the majority of Governorships. They may well lose the majority in the Senate. And, in fact, had Mr. Bush been up for re-election tonight, I'm quite sure that he would have been kicked to the curb just as completely as Rick Santorum, or any number of Republican incumbents who are now out of a job.

We have suffered the rule of these fools for twelve years in Congress and six years in the Executive. We have made our opinion clear, and it is time to suffer them no more. But it is also time to make damn sure that our new majority understands exactly why they were put in office.

Quite simply: this is a gift that the American People have chosen to give, and it has an expiration date. To our new Democratic Overlords: Use Your Power. Do what we want and fix this global cluster-fuck that the New Oil Barons have stuck us in. Do it now or, come November 2008, this gift will be revoked.

Clinton lied but no one died. Bush and Cheney and Rumsfeld and all the rest of them deserve to be impeached, removed from office, tried for their war crimes and then punished accordingly.

That is what today's election was really about, and the people have spoken. Democratic Congress -- do your fucking job, and enforce the will of the people, or else you'll be the next ones to feel our election wrath and be shit out of luck.

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Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Don't Let the Doorknob Hit You Where the Good Lord Split You... 

In news I won't link to, 'cause it's on World Net Daily, a crazed, so-called Christian woman quit her Wal-Mart job in disgust because her employers gave a little money to a gay and lesbian group...
A second worker upset over Wal-Mart's newly-contrived "gay" agenda is quitting the retail chain to take a stand for Christianity, and is citing a report from WND about another woman who also decided she'd had enough.

Karin Laginess, of Auberndale, Fla., told WND yesterday that it was as if "God hit me" when she saw the earlier WND report about Janet Baird.

Baird, of Ohio, heard the shocking new plans that WND had reported several weeks ago directly from the mega-corporation's international headquarters: that the company is, in fact, contributing to the financial and moral agenda of the National Gay and Lesbian Chamber of Commerce.
Well, good-riddance to ya, you homophobic bitch. And good luck trying to sponsor an upgrade to your double-wide by suing Wal-Mart.

But, of course, this again points out the hypocrisy of the NeoCons. Wal-Mart, not exactly the poster child of liberalism (ahemn) has no problem with gays and lesbians when it comes to taking their money -- a small donation, and to the Gay and Lesbian Chamber of Commerce at that, which is probably on the more conservative side of gay politics, seeing as how they're a business group. (Where do you think Log Cabin Republicans come from? Fags with money who want to pay less in taxes, but are rich enough and connected enough that they can screw who they want. Paging Rev. Haggard and Rep. Foley.) So, Wal-Mart drops maybe fifty grand on that group, it gets good press in the gay rags, and all the closet queens in Montana shop at their stores, spending an assload of money.

But, at the same time -- does Wal-Mart provide insurance, benefits or other domestic partnership benefits to the same-sex partners of employees? Probably not. Do they carry gay magazines or gay-themed DVDs? Probably no. Do they carry books with specifically gay themes? Not. Do they sponsor AIDS organizations or contribute to groups trying to legalize gay marriage? Nah.

And yet another religious lunatic doesn't see the forest for the trees. It works like this: the NeoCons, in reality, have no "moral" agenda. They only have a "money" agenda. So, they spout off on how immoral things like abortion and homosexuality are in order to suck contributions from the mouth-breathers. At the same time, they have no problem courting those same organizations in small ways that pay off with big PR and corporate profits. Then, all the while, they pay off our elected officials in big ways to make sure that no law harmful to their bottom line ever makes it through Congress.

That's the real reason that gays and lesbians have made such strides in the last twenty years -- corporate America woke up to the fact that these people have no kids and a lot of disposable income. I lived in West Hollywood for nearly a decade and, during that time, watched the annual Hallowe'en and Gay Pride events morph from community-oriented, almost guerrilla alternative celebrations into corporate ad-fests. In fact, I stopped going to both when, sponsor-wise, they became indistinguishable from any mainstream "breeder" festival anywhere else in the world. In 1990, it was considered brave if any major corporation even had a small table handing out pamphlets. In 2006, every major corporation is fighting for the most visible spot on the biggest stage at the middle of everything.

And they aren't fighting for rights. They're fighting for money. Racist idiots might see black and white; bigoted idiots might see red, blue and pink. But corporations only see green, and no green. Any group that has the green earns their favor -- but only as a target market to be sucked dry.

On the day that the major retailers suddenly realize that they could double their revenue by selling stuff to gay and lesbian couples having weddings is the day that Wal-Mart, Target, DeBeers, etc., start lobbying for legalization -- and the day that our bought and paid for Congress changes their tune.

The great irony, of course, is that NeoCon policies are going to most hurt the blue collar folk who fall for the God & Circuses BS the hardest -- and when those people, no matter how much they wear Jesus on their sleeves, can no longer afford to donate, they will be forgotten as an important demographic group and will lose all clout.

Ironically, the leaders and corporations they seem to admire the most are the ones who worship Mammon over god.

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Sunday, November 05, 2006

How Important Is this Verdict, Really? 

Apparently not so much, because Matt Drudge didn't bother to stay up so that he could stick red sirens and cannons on his website to hype it. Although you can bet your butts that, when he drags his gay ass out of bed with his current paid for escort in the morning, he'll dapple his page with republiporn proclaiming some kind of victory.

But, honestly -- Saddam guilty verdict? Major Fark Up for the Republicans, and they don't even know it yet, for so many reasons...

1) Hussein sentenced to death for killing about 150 Kurds (even though the Iranians did that); begs the question of what sentence Bush et. al. deserve for killing 2900 Americans and half a million Iraquis.

2) When Iraq blows up in major sectarian violence in 3... 2... 1... and the primary target for that violence turns out to be American soldiers, what's that going to look like?

3) One of Saddam's defense attorneys, a major Republican, already called Shenanigans on this whole thing and walked out. Don't think he won't be the first person making sound-bites this morning? Think again?

4) See above; if a court could convict Saddam to death on this relatively minor charge, then Bush, Cheney, Rumsfeld, Gonzalez, Ashcroft and Rice should be doing the Scaffold Tango before Christmas. Hell, they should have been doing it c. 2004.

5) The Generals of the US Armed Forces were smart enough to make their positions clear before this verdict. If the tanks start to roll into Washington tomorrow, I know which side I'm on.

It's real simple, people. If the US can torture people, then the world can torture us. And, conversely, if this court can hang Saddam for a really minor crime, then there is no excuse whatsoever for not convicting the assholes in power in this country for even worse crimes tomorrow. Period.

Let's just hope enough Americans agree to over-ride the rampant Diebold vote fraud planned for Tuesday. Let's hand these Republican Assholes their heads, and end our long national nightmare.

At the moment, it's up to the voters of this country, and here's hoping they do the right thing. But, if they don't or their choices are usurped, let's hope that the American military follows the lead of their generals.

Major house-cleaning on Tuesday, or coup d'etat on Wednesday. There are no other choices, short of another American Civil War.

Yes -- really. This Tuesday is that serious. Now wake up and do something about it.

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Oops... 

I guess no one in Washington realized that a certain verdict opens the door for... well, this:


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Saturday, November 04, 2006

Why Prop. 86 (and all other tax increases) are Bullshit... 

Way back in the long-ago of 1978, Californians had a little tax revolt. They passed Proposition 13, which basically guaranteed that homeowners would not be screwed over by the state whenever it needed to suck up money to fund its mistakes.

But... there's an interesting side-benefit of that Proposition, which is still the law of the land. I give you the California Constitution, Article 13A, as passsed by the voters in 1978 and, to date, unamended:
Section 3. From and after the effective date of this article, any changes in state taxes enacted for the purpose of increasing revenues collected pursuant thereto whether by increased rates or changes in methods of computation must be imposed by an Act passed by not less than two-thirds of all members elected to each of the two houses of the Legislature, except that no new ad valorem taxes on real property, or sales or transaction taxes on the sales of real property may be imposed. [emphasis added]
Or, in other words, according to the California Constitution any tax increase can only be approved by a 2/3rds vote of the legislature, and no tax increase for any purpose whatsoever may be passed by a vote of the people.

Okay, maybe somewhat undemocratic, but the simple truth of it is this: any post-1978 tax increase in California that was only passed by simple majority of the electorate is, per the State Constitution, totally invalid. Period.

Meaning a few other things. First, Proposition 86 isn't even valid, and should not be on the ballot. Second, Previous sales tax increases that only passed by popular vote are invalid. Third, there are grounds here for a major class-action lawsuit. To wit -- the State of California owes a refund of all taxes paid under fraudulent initiatives to all residents or visitors to the state for nearly the last thirty years.

That's what the law says, in black and white, unrefutable. That's the law that your legislators and secretary of state have been ignoring.

And that's the law I'm going to point out to more than a few public interest groups when I call them up on Monday morning.

The law that all the proponents of Prop. 86 can go suck on right now.

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Friday, November 03, 2006

Imagine This... 

Think Iraq is going swimmingly? Well, I can't put you in the mindset of an Iraqi, but let's play what-if in the US...

What if China decided that George Bush and his Rogue Regime were a danger to the world, and invaded our country? Bombed the shit out of our major cities, put Chinese troops everywhere, eventually hunted down and captured Bush and put him on trial for war crimes. In the meantime, they held an election, guarded and officiated by the Chinese, in which the choices were the three biggest pro-Chinese American politicians who had probably been fringe groups beforehand.

They made a big show of pulling down the Washington Monument, but only a hundred people, mostly Greens, showed up to cheer.

Three years later, you have no electricity, no fresh water, half your house is patched up with garbage bags and duct tape, and you risk your life every time you walk outside.

To try to "fix" things, the Chinese want to give the Midwest to Christian Fundamentalists, the west coast to secular humanists, and the east coast to Jews and College professors.

First question: regardless of political party or leaning, what would your reaction be to a foreign invader coming into our country? I don't know about you but -- I'm Liberal as hell, and I'd be one of the first people getting his hands on assault weapons to try to drive the MFers back into the sea.

Second question: regardless of your thoughts about George Bush and his Regime, how would you react to a foreign government trying to topple him? Honestly, I hate his guts and think he should be on trial for war crimes -- but that's for Americans to decide. Believe it or not, if it were a foreign power trying to pull him out of office, I'd do my damnedest to say, "Hey, screw you. We're the only ones who can decide his fate."

Third question: Foreign troops are patrolling your cities and making your life miserable. You and some friends have figured out how to use common household chemicals to make bombs and screw with them. Do you passively sit by and watch your neighborhood get raped, or do you fight back as best you know how?

Oh -- forgot to mention: lots of people you know, close personal friends, have been put in prison or killed, and the ones who aren't dead are being tortured by the evil invaders. Their children are being raped, their houses are being bombed or bulldozed, and, as far as you know, their only crime was walking down the wrong street at the wrong time.

And, okay, you live on the west coast and hate the Christian Fundies -- but they hate the invaders as well -- and when it comes right down to it, all of you are Americans first. So you start to get involved with anti-Invader Christians and East Coast Jewish Intellectuals, and you all work together to figure out how to really screw up the invaders at every possible opportunity.

And they claim to have given you Democracy, except that they guy they've put in power isn't really living up to their standards and it's clear that they're not happy with the election and how it went...

Should I go on? The real question is this: if this little scenario happened in America, how many years would you fight the invader? How long would you resist? How quickly would you forget that you really hated the leader they toppled, but don't care anymore? Or -- loved the leader they toppled, and will resent the invaders forever?

THAT is Iraq today. THAT is the Iraq that will be for the next generation, and THAT is a war that America cannot win. To paraphrase an old 80s movie about Nuclear War, the only way to win is to not play. At this point, the only way to "win" is to get the hell out.

If America were invaded by China, political and religious and racial divisions in this country would vanish instantly. Suddenly, everyone would be considered an American, whether Christian, Muslim, Atheist, Jew, Buddhist, Black, White, Hispanic, Asian, Liberal, Conservative. The KKK and the NAACP would be in the trenches together, because all the BS divisions wouldn't mater any more. The only enemies would be those perceived to be helping the invaders.

That is what we have done to Iraq. Yeah, there are still Sunnis and Shiites but, for the moment, they're not that. They're Iraqis, and we're messing around in their homeland, and they will not stop until we're gone.

This is the fundamental fact that W and Company cannot, will not, refuse to understand. And that is why, next Tuesday, you must vote for those candidates who oppose the war; those candidates who will grow the balls to stop the madness and impeach and imprison the idiots responsible.

Period.

Every other issue is bullshit. Gay marriage? Environment? Morals? Family Values? Even the Economy? Bullshit.

Before next Tuesday, go do some research on the Vietnam War and Watergate. The problem facing this country now makes those issues look as quaint as the Teapot Dome Scandal.

Yes -- our dictator needs to be overthrown, put on trial and punished for his crimes. But it's up to the American people to do it, and we have that power on November 7th. Let's hand these morons their asses on that day, then demand that a New Congress do the right thing and get the hell rid of them all, now.

Remember: Clinton's blowjob didn't cost 3,000 American lives.

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Thursday, November 02, 2006

Olberman Nails It Again 

Just watch. This man is Edward R. Murrow incarnate -- the most important commentator on the planet at this point in time.


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Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Sink that Swift Boat 

Maybe John Kerry didn't word his joke so well, but his comments the other day were absolutely un-newsworthy. It was clear that he was trying to make a joke about a certain C-Average elected official who has now got us stuck in Iraq. Kerry, a veteran, was not calling the troops stupid.

But the Republicans are desperately trying to spin anything they can get their hands on, and the mainstream media don't want to let this go. However, in the real world, it seems that a vast majority of people haven't bought into the spin and don't take Kerry's words to be some huge declaration that "America Sucks".

The Republicans are in big trouble next Tuesday, and they know it. But it looks like, outside of their lapdogs in the media, most people just aren't buying the bullshit any more.

Yes, next Tuesday's election will be a referendum on Iraq. But I think we'll also see something else. A referendum on our politicians, which could lead to wholesale failure of ballot measures, a lot of incumbents losing office and, with any luck, a change of control in both houses of Congress.

It's what happened in California when Arnold had his special election -- every single proposition failed. Now, if you've ever lived in California for any length of time, you know that voters here seem to love them some propositions, and they've passed some damn stupid ones over the years. (Prop. 187, anyone?) So that special election was actually quite a sea-change, and possibly a hint of what's to come.

Vote next Tuesday. In the meantime, separate the bullshit from the issues; the spin from reality.

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