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Monday, April 25, 2005

Wanna Buy a Bridge? 

In the "yeah, right" category, this bit of news
Pope [Ratzo] said Monday he had viewed the idea of being elected pope as a "guillotine," and he prayed to God during the recent conclave to be spared selection but "evidently this time He didn't listen to me."
I sense a big whiff of false humility here. Anyone who saw Ratzo's face when he was presented to the crowd could see the gleam of power in his eye, that little shimmer you see in every Oscar winners' face. He wanted it, he was praying for it, he got it.

'Cause, you see, when someone is voted pope, the first question is, "Do you accept?" It was entirely within Ratzo's power to say, "Thanks, but no thanks, pick someone else." He didn't, now he's pope, and any protestations to the contrary are nothing more than a big fat steamin' load of papal bullshit.

From the same article, dueling quotes:
"I thought that I had done my life's work and could now hope to live out my days in peace. I told the Lord with deep conviction, 'Don't do this to me.'"...

He told [his German audience] the church is not a place for people seeking a comfortable life, noting that it is difficult to choose to follow Christ.

"He who is looking to be comfortable has come to the wrong address," he said.
Emphasis added. And, finally, despite his earlier comments that other, non-Catholic churches are not churches because they don't recognize the primacy of da pope:
"I ask you for your trust when I make errors or when I say things that aren't easily understood, because the pope has to say these things. If we stick together, then we will find the way."
Um... errors? Hey, Ratzo, I thought you magically became infallible when they stuck the big white hat on your head.

Perhaps he was too old to become pope. Already, his comments are very muddled. Not to be rude -- but I'm going to be rude. I don't think it'll be long at all before Pope Ratzo is doing the JP II slouch and drool routine in public. Expect the next papal election to happen before the end of 2010, if that late.

PS: The posting title actually works out to be a very obscure gag, based on a line from John Donne that a high school English class had to explain to us once, to our response of "Huh?" 'Cause the line was "the great work pontifical." We all assumed it meant the pope. It didn't. I'll leave it to my readers to go figure it out for themselves...

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