Monday, June 27, 2005

False Profits 

Anybody remember this guy, the "Prophet" Yahweh, who was going to call down a big ass UFO to hover over Las Vegas during the first two weeks of June? Um... I remember the original story, but I don't remember no big ass UFOs hovering over Vegas for several days.

This dude kind of got the ball rolling when he lured a (gullible) news crew out and showed them a UFO. And, on first inspection, the video seems pretty spooky. Yahweh takes a news crew out in the field, summons UFO on demand.

Except... note the "whoo-hoo" wording. The news crew makes a big deal about meeting Yahweh at a time and place of their choice. So? He knew ahead of time. And, seems to me, if you tell someone, "We're going to meet you at the far end of the strip at three o'clock on Tuesday," it makes it pretty easy for him to have a confederate with the magic weather balloon hiding nearby.

If I'd been running this show, it'd have gone like this. We'd ask Yahweh where we could pick him up, then we'd collect him in a limo with darkened windows, blindfold his ass, and drive a zig-zag route to hell and back. He couldn't object if his powers were legit, right? And then, after hauling him all over Vegas until he had no idea where he was, we'd pop him out of the limo, insist on a pat-down search (can't have any pesky pagers or cellphones in the way, can we?). And then, we'd insist he keep his hands on the car while he summons his UFO.

Look to the skies and see... jack shit.

Watch the video again with one thing in mind: Yahweh is in the field with some suck-ass gullible reporters, and whatever it is floating in the sky was unleashed by a confederate hidden beyond the trees, a confederate who knew the exact time and location of the meeting. "Time and place of our chosing" is a red-herring, because it doesn't mean that Yahweh had no control. He had all the control in the world.

I think that Yahweh is just a publicity whore. If he were legit, he'd call down a UFO to hover over the White House, or over #10 Downing Street (memo)... or somewhere not so touristy.

And, like all "prophets," once the date for his feat has passed and nothing has happened, you won't see him media-whoring so much anymore. Paging Jean Dixon, or the Amazing Criswell, or all the others...

Oops. Did I just mention two dead psychics? And, your point? None of them ever made a valid prediction in their lifetime. In fact, I have a book by Criswell in my collection that's rather amusing, since it predicted that the world would end in December 1999. Oops. We're still here. He's not. And the Prophet Yahweh is as full of shit as any of them.

UFOs over Vegas? Nah. Other than a naive news crew, I ain't seen no such thing.

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